My Secret Pleasure

I just love Costco! I love it!  When we got our membership we spent over two hours slowly going up and down each aisle.  We wanted to buy everything.  Of course I could use a five pound bag of chocolate chips.  Duhhh…who couldn’t?  Of course we needed three pounds of mayonnaise.  Come on. 

I look forward to every trip.  Our shopping list has changed dramatically.  Instead of spending three hundred dollars we now spend a little over a hundred or less.  We no longer linger in the aisles either.  We walk purposely through the warehouse scooping up the staples we need to get by.  Organic milk, cheese, butter, fruit, toilet paper, paper towels, garbage bags….you get the picture.

Another thing has changed as well.  Jack’s nap.  It now coincides perfectly with our trips to Costco.  This is somewhat of a dilemma.  This nap takes place in our car.  Jack’s favorite place to sleep.  He is usually out cold by the time we get there and that means that someone needs to stay in the car with him while he sleeps.  That someone is me.  That’s right. I drew the short straw on this one.  I am delegated to car babysitter while my husband gets to live it up in the aisles of Costco.  How unfair!!!  I mean he never even goes down the book aisle or ponders buying socks he doesn’t need.  What a waste of a Costco trip.  He never comes out with a giant bag of chocolate chips or dehydrated blueberries that have way too much sugar in them. What’s wrong with him?

(Lame Jeanie Alert!!!  Please be advised that in my pre-baby life a trip to Costco was a once a year affair to buy Ramen Noodles and tuna fish a la my friend Charlie.  I had never before considered a trip to Costco or any other store like it, for that matter, to be anything but a pain in the tooshie.  A trip to the beach? Well, now you’re talking, a hot day spent drinking margaritas you betcha, but Costco….what’s happened to me?  I just felt the need to point out that I was once kinda cool.)

For a while I would fume about this turn of events and wonder how fate could have dealt me such a hand.  I would wonder where my balls were, oh wait I don’t have any.  I would wonder where my big mouth was at times like these.  Why wasn’t I disputing this decision??  Why do I have to stay in the car?  Why can’t my husband sit there?

You know what though?  Secretly I like waiting in the car.  It is so quiet in the car while Jack is asleep.  I pull out my book and bask in the silence.  I am actually disappointed when my husband returns with the cart and I have to put my book away.  I love reading and watching people try to maneuver their giant shopping carts filled with bulk items through the crowded parking lot.  I am always waiting for one of them to smash into a car or spill some of their stuff out their cart.  Besides, uninterrupted reading is my favorite thing ever.  I never say no to uninterrupted reading.  Heck, I stay in the bathroom longer than I need to for a little uninterrupted reading time. TMI?? Sorry, but it’s true.

It’s funny how things like that happen isn’t it?  At first I was really annoyed that I had to be the one to sit in the car and miss aisle after aisle of bulk food, but it turned out to be just the perfect fit for me and I wouldn’t trade places for anything…except maybe a giant bag of chocolate chips.



1 Comment

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One response to “My Secret Pleasure

  1. Em

    I remember Charlie coming back from Costco with boxes and boxes of Twizlers and Lick-m-Aid. Oh my god, Lick-m-Aid! Weren’t we really into them for a while? Anyway, thanks for a good laugh.

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