The Littlest Vampire

I ran into a vampire in Whole Foods this morning. Well, I ran into a guy that plays a vampire on t.v. in Whole Foods today. Actually, I didn’t exactly run into him. It was more like pseudo-stalking on my part.

Let me clear things up. One of my guilty pleasures is watching The Vampire Diaries on the CW. It is cheesy and sappy and juvenile and I LOVE IT!! I do. Those Salvatore brothers make me feel like I am nineteen again. Aahh nineteen…what a good year. Well, I was at the top of the elevator when I saw him, Paul Wesley…aka Stephen Salvatore, going down into Whole Foods and that’s when the stalking began. As a New Yorker who is used to seeing celebrities and actors I was kind of embarrassed about following this “kid” through a grocery store, but that didn’t stop me. And to be honest, I didn’t really stalk him. I just happened to be near him while he was making himself a salad, checking out the fruit, looking at bread…

Up close this vampire was just so ummm small. He was very handsome don’t get me wrong. He was just small. That boy has the tiniest waist I have ever seen and a pair of chicken legs that would probably taste great with some spicy sauce and blue cheese dressing. I think I could have picked him up and held him in the palm of my hand. I mean his butt was just a little bit bigger than my two year old son’s teeny tiny hiney. Not exactly the powerful vampire seen on television.

As we stood in line together to pay for our salads I noticed how he kept fingering the display of chocolate bars next to him. I so badly wanted to yell out, “Just buy one. Oh for goodness sakes buy ten.” When he went to pay for his food I was kind of sad that I got to see him in this light. I don’t know if I will be able to look at him as a vampire again. Or watch the show without wanting some chicken wings.
Oh well there’s always his television brother Ian Somerhalder.

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